Saru Pariyar

It's been a while  Maybe almost a year  Since I have been learning detachments ,  Idk when and how I lost the attachment with myself So now this is going to be my 25th spring, 25th autumn and 25th new 365 days to suffer or maybe just experience, whatever you call it  This year I want to dedicate this day to mourn for the heaviest loss of my life that almost sank me to the depth, that almost shook me  Dear baba,  I don't really remember the early days of my life but the day I remember is you bringing me a black and white TV when you saw me watching TV in other people's room from their door and the way they shut their door in front of my face  I remember you, me , mummy and brother sitting by lighting a candle because it was the time of load shedding and you telling me how amazing I would look in my school uniform and you made that all with your own hands, sewed with every bit of love  I remember you giving me your finger to hold onto and carrying b...

  फर्कनु जो अब फर्केर हेर्न सक्दैन, मेरा आखा उहि बाटोमा गडिएका छन् कहिँ कतै बाटो बिराएरै भएपनि आउछ कि भन्ने आशमा कहिँ कतै केही बहाना बनाएर ढोका ढकढक्याउँछ कि भन्ने आशमा। त्यो बाटोले अब साथी पाउँदैन भन्ने थाहा भइसक्दा पनि भन मलाई कसरी पर्खाइलाई रोक्न सकिन्छ? फर्कनेको घडी रोकिसक्यो, पर्खिनेको घडीको ब्याट्रि फेरेको फेरि छ भन मलाई फर्कनेले ऋतु पनि बिर्सियो पर्खनेलाई किन बसन्तको आश छ? लामो दुरिको यात्रामा गएका हरु आखिरमा फर्केर आए तर भन मलाई फर्केर आइसक्दा पनि किन पर्खाई सकिदैन?

 I still remember, the very moment when I was on the stage, didn't know what to do, how to recieve that prize given by our respected principal then, all that 5 years old girl knew was to search for her mom. She was right there clapping and smiling and at the same time drops of tears were rolling down. I didn't know what was that, I didn't know why she was crying, I didn't know why I was there on the stage, and now when I look back into that moment I wish I could go there and hug my mom and say "yayyyyyyyyy I did it mummy, are you proud of me?" I want to play it good this time, am I lucky enough for that? #mothersday

     केही कुरा छन्, जो म भन्न चाहन्छु तर म चाहन्न कि तिमी सुन। र केही कुरा मलाई थाहा छन् तर म चाहन्न कि तिमी त्यो भन।